Wednesday, October 17, 2007

The Tenant, Part III

Fortunately for us, our tenant really wants to find a place in town. He is unable/unwilling to get his driver's license, and this prohibits him from living with us. We're country folk, and there is no feasible way for him to commute into town and back without a car; never mind the errands he would need to run now and again.

Of course, this didn't stop him from agreeing to live with us, as I presume he thought I would just cart him around with me and the rest of the kids and make sure he was where he needed to be. Because if you have four kids, what's one more person depending on you, right? Besides, I really needed to give up the bon bons, and in so doing would free up scads of time.

Yesterday, a place near the school opened up with a private room and bath. The principal let me know that a teacher would drive him out and help him transfer his stuff. He seemed apologetic that he had unknowingly saddled us with a man-child who couldn't drive, offering to make us dinner for our troubles. I have to admit, it is a win-win situation. We can act disappointed that he is unable to logistically arrange for living out of town, and we no longer have to deal with basically supporting an exchange student. Now the kids will just see him for dance class and that's just fine with me.

When the kids and I got home, I peeked in the guest house and noticed it was devoid of his stuff; the transfer had gone smoothly. Sigh of relief.

This morning I put Jack down for a nap and went into the guest house to clean up. We have family coming for a visit this week, and I needed to wash the linens and make the place presentable. Everything looked pretty clean, and just needed minimal work. I stripped the bed, then went into the closet for the rest of the linens to take into the house. That's when it struck me. I grabbed my cell phone and called Bob at the office.

"Bob? The cobalt blue sheets are missing."

32 comments:

theghelertertwins.blogspot.com said...

Get the eff out?! What does he think, you're the local Holiday Inn! That is too funny but sooo sad....

Dorky Dad said...

SHEETS? He took SHEETS? Who does that? Honestly, there are about 2 million other things ahead of sheets on my List of Things to Steal.

painted maypole said...

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

flutter said...

LOL.

That is so classic. I hope the cobalt sheets dye his butt blue.

MamaLee said...

NO SHIT.

OMG. Get them back!

Someone is in TROUBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fairly Odd Mother said...

He probably burned them in a huff. "Must burn terrible, awful cobalt sheets! they are keeping me awake at night!"

I took in a foreign intern once when I was young and foolish (and living alone in a tiny apartment). She was interesting, to say the least, but at least she didn't leave with any sheets.

dawn224 said...

I hope that cobalt blue gives him nightmares :)

Jessica @ A Bushel and a Peck said...

SHUT UP. WTF???? Go get those sheets back!!!

Amy said...

well clearly there was a marauding sheet stealer on the loose in your neighborhood. He could not/would not have taken them, he's allergic to cobalt blue!

Crystal said...

Bahahaha.
Maybe he meant to say he is addicted to cobalt blue sheets not allergic to cobalt blue sheets. I think he wanted a souvenir from his stay with you. What a nut.

Circus Kelli said...

THAT is classic.

Carrie said...

That dirty rat... I'd forget about them, the sheets that is, because ugh.

Carrie said...

That dirty rat... I'd forget about them, the sheets that is, because ugh.

Sophie's Mom said...

Bwaaa ha ha! I thought you were going to find something freaky in the closet...

He must have thought it to be his parting gift!

Doug said...

Perhaps he needed the pillowcases to haul some of his stuff. And what good is a set of sheets if they are missing pillowcases. Sounds like he did you a favor by taking the whole set.

Then again, maybe he used them as payola to the movers.

Amber said...

That is SO awesome! After the huffy act he put on about the HORROR of the COBALT. You are lucky (blessed) to have gotten rid of him. I say that like you didn't know that already, but I was really just reiterating. Whew!

Anna said...

Are you kidding? You can ask him to leave them at dance class.

Audubon Ron said...

For crying out loud. We got to figure a way to write this guy out so he doesn’t return to the story.

Nancy said...

Maybe since you brought them to him the day he moved in, still in the bag, he assumed it was a gift?

He told you he was allergic to cobalt blue, perhaps he exchanged them.

Sounds like something I would just let go ... not worth the school/neighborhood/ gossip it would stir up.

Lela said...

OMG! The notorious linen theif has struck again!

BetteJo said...

At least he left you with a wonderful punchline for his exit story!
I must admit though, I was looking forward to some stories. Guess that would be at your expense tho, huh? Sorry. :(

3rdcoastkaren said...

No good deed goes unpunished, as my gram would say!
What a maroon!

Epic said...

WHAT? I thought he was, how you say, "allergic" to colbalt blue?

Jen M. said...

I can only wonder in horror if he somehow found out about my website. Either that or it was an oversight on his part, and he will subsequently have major hives....it is, how you say, a mystery.

Mrs. Chicken said...

OH MY GOD.

Freak!

Shauna Loves Chocolate said...

Serious? Oh my God. No other words.

Cathy said...

No freaking way!

I knew you were leading up to something, but sheet thievery? What a bizarre thing to do, especially since, even though he doesn't live there anymore, you'll still be seeing one another.

OK, you have to tell us what Bob said, given his earlier ... um ... concerns.

Mommy off the Record said...

Yikes. Who takes sheets??

Erika said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
BipolarLawyerCook said...

I am, how you say, an ungrateful mooch?

Just Seeking said...

This is way too funny! I too am hoping the sheets turn his butt blue!

crazymumma said...

no freaking way. He is just so unbelievable...did you get them back?