Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Go Ahead. Make My Day

Bob and I were sitting on the couch the other night, musing as we usually do about the kids, life, and the future. At one point we realized that Maddie is a few short years away from college (okay, five years) and once at school, she will bring home boyfriends that may become her husband one day.

"You do realize," I said, "that we are going to have to be real clear with these men. They are going to have to know that we are that family who will be in their business as much as possible."

"Yeah. And we're going to have to also make it clear that if he hurts our daughter, we're going to kill him."

"Definitely. We'll have to explain that there is nothing we have to lose. After all these years raising kids, a stint in women's prison would be a haven."

I thought about it some more. 23 hours in lockdown, with nothing to do but read a book. Alone. Then an hour to go exercise outdoors.

I'm going to be a loose cannon in a few years.


Jenny said...

You know, now that you bring it up...maybe prison would be a good vacation.

Plus, free medical care.

Jennifer aka Binky Bitch said...

Wow, prison doesn't sound so bad!

jen said...

three meals a day, too.

Annie said...

Good point!

Lela said...

Oooh, that does sound nice. I wonder if the jumpsuit is comfy? And you don't have to cook everyday! Nice!

BipolarLawyerCook said...

I have sometimes wished for some vague illness to keep me from going to work or doing any work at home, but which doesn't prevent me from still getting paid, reading all day, and occasionally going to TJ Maxx for fresh air. Alas, I think it's called the lottery.

Sarah said...

Your daughter is so lucky to have parents like you.

Cathy said...

Only you don't get your own panties.

I wrote a story about that particular issue several years back.

The panties are just passed out randomly after they're laundered.