Tuesday, April 15, 2008

It's all Such a Norman Rockwell Life

On occasion, my cousin likes to send me snippets of her life. I like to do the same, and we enjoy guessing who's life is more likely to make one of us cry funnier at the moment.

They say that families who eat together enjoy closer bonds, fewer issues at school, and stronger ties to both family and community. You decide.

Excerpt from Get in the Car's table:

Maddie: "I'm a vegetarian! I won't eat chicken!"

Chloe: "I'll eat the chicken, mom. Mmmmm. Chicken." [shoots look at sister to indicate that she won round one of who is the better daughter]

Jacob: [making rude sounds with armpit] "Mom? Does chicken make your muscles big?"

Jack: [places cheese in water glass]. "Pthpfh."

Bob: "Let's talk about me."

Maddie: "Can I picket KFC? They torture chickens."

Chloe: "I finished my state report early. Did you know that the chicken was almost the state bird of Delaware? Milk is the official state beverage. Did you see how I finished my milk?"

Me: "Bob, please uncork the wine."

Snippet from My Cousin's Recent Evening Repast...

Cousin: "So, when did you know you wanted to marry me?"

Husband of Cousin:"Oh probably that night I got really drunk at that party and was really rude to you about the topic of marriage and then I was really hungover the next day and we went out to breakfast and I threw up outside the restaurant and everyone saw. When you stuck around after that, I figured you were a keeper."


Husband of Cousin:"And also, I think I was just ready to get married, you know? I realized the whole dating thing was bull crap."

Cousin. "Oh. That's pretty romantic, O."

Husband of Cousin: "I know, I never say romantic things, do I? But I was always really attracted to you."

Cousin: (Brightening) "Really? What do you mean, always?"

Husband of Cousin: "Oh, like since the first time I met you at that apartment building. I thought you were hot."

Cousin: (Batting eyes) "Really? Like hot, how?"

Husband of Cousin: "Can you believe they charge $33 for this rack of lamb? I mean, this is a $12 serving, at most. We should have gotten nachos at the bar."



becky said...

I must have married a clone of your cousin's husband - and we had kids just like yours. TOO FUNNY! That's my life too. You're not alone.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Well maybe not so much Norman Rockwell, but definitely life!

Tootsie Farklepants said...

Way funnier than a Norman Rockwell life!

suz said...

So funny!
I remember those dinners. My kids are a bit older, so the conversations are basicaly the same, but more mature topics. Oh and lots of burbs!
Love your blog!

Circus Kelli said...

One time, sometime between the time Clown #2 and Clown #3 was born, in those dark, quiet moments before couples drift off to sleep, my husband uttered those words that every woman longs to hear... "You know, I still find you somewhat attractive..."

Then he laughed.

Joanie said...

Let's all have dinner together in this calendar year. But you have to serve Lily's favorite "hot sexy noodles."

Love, your cousin

Beth said...

Hmmmm...both of these dinner conversations remind me why I like Girl's Night Out dinners so much!

SuburbanCorrespondent said...

Hmmm...I posted about the joys of family dinner at my blog tonight, too. And...your cousin's husband sounds like a real romantic.

Jennifer said...

Bragging again there, Jen, aren't you... *grin*

Jen M. said...

Yup. Suburban bliss is all mine!

liv said...

your cousin is a lucky laday. it's just after 11 am here and i could sure go for the lamb, while sitting half naked at my computer.

BipolarLawyerCook said...

You had me at Jack Places Cheese in Water Glass: Phthpfh.