When I've come to you, wonderful people who read this blog, and vent my frustrations because a hormone poisoned child has rolled her eyes at me, slammed a door, or delivered an invective more venomous than, um, things with lots of venom, I have usually been referring to my oldest daughter. In three short months she is officially a teenager, and from what I have heard, I'm not out of the woods for a while. In fact, I can't even find my damn compass.
But now, now the other daughter is closing in on puberty. And to say it can suck at times? Well, it sucks so much that I think the handsome anal-retentive Dyson Vacuum guy should talk about it on television, next to his immaculately rendered model of the Anti Bitch 3000 - Now With Twice the Suckage. Having two girls about to get their periods living with you, plus the cyclone we call the kindergartner plus the upgraded to Hurricane Jack that is our toddler and I feel like a human punching bag a lot of the time. Like school mornings. Which would be now. Instead of typing this, I really should be whistling a merry tune to my bird friends in the kitchen window while packing their lunches and cooking their breakfast. Instead, I have taken a brief refuge in my office.
So with that opening, I have been mulling something over for a while. I think I need a little time each week with people I didn't birth on a more consistent basis. After eight years, I am thinking about going back to work part-time. Okay - I am opening my eyes. Are you still there? Good! More later...I'm off to make waffles and be pummeled.
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34 comments:
You already know what it is to be a working mom, so you won't have that hurdle to jump as I did, and I have to tell you that despite the fact that work has some strong sucking power of its own, it's kind of nice to be around folks who are not involved in the usual school/soccer/community life, where we have things in common other than our children. (So ends the longest run on sentence EVER.)
I know you'll get a lot of comments on this one. I have much hindsight on this subject, and having lived thru it, I can assure you, you will, too. All will be right with the world when the second daughter turns 18. Sorry, I know you didn't want to hear that, but hang tough.
As for going back to work part-time, this may preserve your sanity. Sanity is good.
But it won't serve your purposes unless you make sure you're at work when the girls are home! I mean, isn't it great when they are at school?
Work would be great for your self-esteem, which teen daughters have a reputation for tearing to shreds. Not that I would know...(ahem)...but just keep in mind that then you will have 2 jobs, because you can bet that your children aren't going to cheerily pick up the slack. On the other hand, it's fun making them do the laundry and the dishes...
I have a 3.5-year-old and a 20-month-old. I work 25 hours a week, MTW, and let me tell you, while the rest of the working world groans about it being Monday morning, I am nearly skipping off to the coffee pot. Because at work? I get to go to the bathroom alone.
My point is, your idea has some merit, really.
Wow. This post makes me grateful that mine are still 3 and under. Who knew that was possible?
Keep us updated re - your status as a punching bag and working part-time. Oh, and it does sound like it's time for another martini hangover. :)
I've posted before (to mixed reviews) "they" morf into other beings around 12-13 BUT the good thing is they return back to human life form around 19-20.
As far as working? I've never not worked since I was 15. I worked both days both kids were delivered (how convenient to go into labor after 5PM) and went back after each baby at 4 weeks.
I'm not sure I'd know how to behave if I didn't work.
Give it a part-time try.
I have always had a (very, very) part-time job, and it does keep you sane. With three teen-agers at home I truly enjoy my time away when I'm at school. Go for it!
Ugh, I have 1 teenage boy and a girl that is 10 going on 13... Then there are 3 girls behind her... lord help me. LOL.
Do you live in AZ? I could use some adult conversation.. Grins.
While work does have sukiness, getting out of the house and mixing it up with adults, is a very good thing for your sanity. Best of luck!
I always gloated that having two boys meant I would never have a teenaged daughter. Now, here I am pregnant again...
i pretty much DON'T envy you right now...even though I totally want a couple of daughters someday.
a friend of mine has 5 kids and the oldest one is finally old enough to drive. when she needs a break, she gives each of the younger kids $20 and the oldest $50, sends them to the local pizza/arcade place and tells her to not even THINK about coming back home until every penny is spent haha
I work part time and LOVE it. I am one of the happy ones come Monday morning. And, I do think that my daughters awful mood swings got a bit better after she finally started her period. Not sure why, but she started 3 months ago and it seems like we're having less of the teenage drama now. Or, that could be the crack I'm smoking!
so, where did you want to go on vacation??
and btw, i have a hardcore crush on that james dyson. there is something in the cadence of his voice that just sends me over the edge. does not make me want to vacuum though.
Wow. I have 2 girls 7 and 3.5 and so far the 7 year old is in pre-puberty, driving me crazy and crying for no good reason.
I worked part-time last year and it was nice, it was hard but I did enjoy it. Even if I was a glorified receptionist.
Yes. I vote yes. Work is therapy for home, and vice versa.
EWWW
Amazingly, though I fought it tooth and nail, once I did it, I realized just how much I missed humans.
I recently made this decision for pretty much the same reason, only my little darlings are very young. I am looking forward to it, but also scared as hell. I know that being with my kids is important, but when being a stay-at-home mom makes me miserable, it isn't working for anyone. I also have never subscribed to the mom should give up everything for her children school of thought. We are people too and have our own desires and needs.
I have a 18 month old daughter and 3 year old son. Everyone tells me that my daughter's adolescence will be much harder than my son's crazy boyness and that his sanity as a teenager will balance out the raging luncatic that my daughter will become. Gosh, I hope so.
I work part-time and is it okay if I confess that I LOVE IT? ;)
HA! I thought you were going to say you needed more manicure/martini nites.
I have one child, a daughter who will turn 13 in a week. I work part time and I LOVE IT.
My daughter started her period a year ago. I think once her hormones really kicked in the attitude came along with it. I have moments of her still being "my girl" but sometimes it is like having a strange adult living in my house, eating my food and leaving messes around the house.
Come on down this way, babe....we'll have girl time :)
From the Mom who will have NO MORE TEENAGERS in 13 days. Sing along with me "I Will Survive".
It was actually much harder on my hsuband and son, who kept asking me "What's WRONG with her????" and I would say "Nothing is WRONG, she's a teenage girl"
Try to give them a snuggly lap to cry into and some extra calcium (we SWORE by those chocolate flavored calcium chews that were recommended by my doc)
Since she went to college she thinks I'm the BEST MOM EVER!
Oh no! Good luck to you, love with the teenagers!
I say give the working part time thing a try! Who knows... you might like it! :)
First time commenting (I think - who knows, my memory is kaput). I'm with you on this one. Mine is almost 12 and hormones are a-raging. I'm terrified of what will happen once "her friend" arrives. Shit, there's not room for two bitches in the house!
Feed her cashew nuts...it makes them nicer to know!
You think have two girls with their period is bad, imagine having SIX (Seven counting my mom)!! My poor dad might as well have left the house for a week every month!!
Today's topic of conversation on BBC Radio was: Moms who are physically abused by their children.
Eye rolling is just the beginning-- change the locks now Jen! Just joking (kind of). As much as I want to be available when the school calls to say "come pick up the Barfo-rama", and the last minute, "Mom, didn't you KNOW I was playing the lead in tomorrow's play?!", I sometimes think my kids would benefit from having me out of the house with other grown-ups. Good luck with this!
am SO curious to hear how this turns out for you. am cheering for you whatever way it turns out. haven't figured it all out myself & my pummeling is of a different sort with three boys, 5 & under, but still feel bruised at times....
meanwhile, if you do begin out-of-the-home work, make sure to refer your husband to THIS study: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080306/ap_on_re_us/sharing_chores
you know this headline, "men who do housework may get more sex" just caught my eye & i suspect i am not the only momma blogger to write a post about it toay..
The Dyson Anti-Bitch 3000...I could point one of those at myself some days lately! Just whisper to the Dyson guy first (Mr. Dyson?) that it can't cost, like, $500. That would interfere with my latte budget, and I'd really have to bitch about that.
I've been telling friends I've been aghast at the teenager-y things that have come out of my three-year-old's mouth. But, I'm sure it's nothing compared to how the *real* teenage years will be. Hang in there....
Thank God I just have one daughter!
This is why I was happy when my 2 yo daughter's preschool teacher told me she was a boy trapped in a girl's body. I high-fived her! The teacher AND Brynn!
Hi, I just had to tell you how much I relate to the name of your blog. I can't yet imagine the puberty years. Mine are 7 and 9, but wow - what a preview! Thanks for the giggle and good luck with your part time work!
I say go for it. Get a job so you can be out and about with new and different people for a while. Maybe you could do volunteer work for a couple of weeks first though, to see if it feels good and right to you and your life.
And as for the hormonal girls, maybe boarding school? ; )
It is hard with girls at that stage because even if they understand it is hormones making them feel so strange and irritable, it isn't really practical knowledge. I "know" that E=MC2 but I couldn't apply that knowldege to work in my everyday life if I had to! So just take a deep breath and remember that someday they will have daughters just as challenging!
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