Monday, January 28, 2008

Small Talk


Saturday Bob and I took the older kids skiing. It was the perfect day for it; sunny, cold, no wind, and just the beautiful snowy mountain to enjoy with our kids.

And we did enjoy it. The girls had a blast, and Bob got to help me get off the ski lift like an old lady. He is a really good skier, and I'm perfectly happy keeping it to the lower slopes. Anyone remember what happened to Sunny Bono? That's not going to be me. Bob is very patient with all the non-hotshot skiers he lives with, although he has a habit of stopping short right in front of me and blowing snow everywhere like he's in a Chap Stick commercial.

Sometimes we would ride up on different lifts, and when that happened, it was an opportunity to engage in small talk with out of towner skiers for the slow ride up.

I should mention that Bob is the cheapest man on the planet and likes more than anything to purchase a piece of clothing and amortize the wear over a period of years so that it's down to twenty cents a year. Last year his brother handed down an eighties ski ensemble to him. He wore it to the slopes, complete with his 1986 Rossignals that are so out of date they look like cross country skis.

No matter - people loved it. They chatted with him on the lifts, shared parenting stories, corporate stories, and tips on conquering the black diamond run.

Me? I rode up with an eleven year-old, and a series of middle-aged men who acted smarmily pleased when I told them I stayed home. Older men seem to think this is the "only way to go" and inevitably give me a "good for you" when I tell them this is what I do.

This doesn't make me want to share a hot toddy with them back at the lodge. First, I used to work and plan on going back when Jack is old enough. Second, it confirms my suspicion that all these old farts judge my working mom friends for a series of antiquated reasons that boils down to a bunch of white men wanting to control my uterus or my work status.

At the top of one of the shorter runs I grabbed Bob by his electric blue ski lapels and hissed, "You know if I wanted to work, I would, right? Staying at home is fine for now, but you know it is probably temporary, right?"

Boy, does he love being married to me.

28 comments:

Biddy said...

that is awesome! "electric blue ski lapels" heheheheheheheeeeeeee

man, i haven't been skiing in so long i'd probably have to stick to the bunny slope

imbeingheldhostage said...

I miss that mountain! NOT for skiing(I'd rather have a molar pulled--wait, if I hit a tree, I could accomplish both)), but for riding the lift in the Fall. Both our military Bobs are lucky guys, aren't they!
And just so's you knows, I am not a slacker about thanking you with picture and praise on my blog--the US Postal service seems to be enjoying my book too much to deliver it to me. I'll let you know as soon as it comes! Thx :-)

Audubon Ron said...

Sounds like fun.

I take out old people and small kids. The bunny slopes are WAY too fast for me. Every time I’ve been skiing I’ve gotten bed ridden kind of sick. I’d rather be stranded on an island like Tom Hanks in Cast Away than slop’in it.

Mrs. G. said...

You will work when you are damn good and ready. Work outside the house that is.

I will always think of Bob as the Bon Jovi of skiers. What an image.

Rachel said...

I know what you mean about those guys' comments. I chose to be a SAHM because that was what worked for us, but it annoyed me to no end when people made those assumptions. (But I also get annoyed when I hear someone say, "I could never be a SAHM" as though it's a fate worse than death.)

Suburban Correspondent said...

Middle-aged? Or old? Make up your mind! And I'm finding those courtly gentlemen in their 50's and 60's (I assume that's who you meant) downright attractive lately. It's weird.

Nancy said...

Bwa-hahah @ Bob amortizing clothing.

When my kids were small, I wanted to go to "work" to relax!

There's nothing about "not working" when you are a stay-at-home-parent.

Anonymous said...

We're living parallel lives. Andrew's the chapstick commercial who amortizes clothing, and I'm the work-at-home-for-now, athletically challenged skier.

Life As I Know It said...

Whenever I tell someone I stay at home I am always quick to follow it up with "but I'm going back to work in a few years...". I don't know why I need to make than known. I'm sure it's my own uncertainty and identity crisis I seemed to have acquired since staying home.

Mary Beth said...

I think the jobs stay at home mom's do are so important and you should never have to apologize or add it that you're going back to the work force once the kids are old enough. Anyone who looks down on the job you ladies do hasn't tried it. This is one of my pet peeves, next to teachers only working 6 hours a day (tops) and getting summers off. HAH!

Unknown said...

That is hilarious! Hee hee!

Yeah, it seems that no matter what decision women make about staying home/working outside the home, we can't win.

It's been said that if you leave a comment on my blog your skin will become taut, poreless, and youthful. -- That's fantastic! How soon does it happen? Does it take more than one comment? :)

Beck said...

I've run into more weird crap about being a SAHM more times then I can count. My favorite is "But WHAT DO YOU REALLY DO?". So now I tell people that I'm a stripper.
Your husband can't be the cheapest man in the world while my husband still walks this earth: HE MAKES HIS MOTHER BUY ALL OF HIS CLOTHING. I am NOT kidding.

Kristi B said...

Bob looks awesome in that suit!!!

And yes, when you're good and ready, dammit, you'll do what you want and when you want.

Family Adventure said...

I wish I was there to see Bob and his Rossignals. Really, that would have just made my day :)

As far as the 'staying at home' thingy goes...I'm with Beck!

Heidi

Little Miss Sunshine State said...

When my kids were little I stayed home for 5 years. I just couldn't imagine getting myself and 2 kids dressed and out of the house at the crack of dawn.
Back then, companies weren't exactly "family friendly".There was no Family Leave and my job only allowed 6 sick-days a year. You could wipe that out with one sweep of the stomach bug.

I know how lucky I was that I could stay home and I have no regrets.

Jan said...

I did it both ways. I stayed at home as long as it was financially feasible, When Bob took a position he loved, and stayed with until he retired, but at a large cut in pay, I went to work.

Parenting is the most important job any of us will ever have. It's far more important than a spotless house or huge amounts of money in the bank.

Work at home, work outside the home, but parent well.

B2G said...

yay skiing! i think it's great that you take your kids. and oddly, my friend and i were just talking about sonny bono dying from hitting a tree this weekend. wierd.

Liv said...

dude. your man is HAWT in that suit. i love it. that cat is money.

Tootsie Farklepants said...

I think you should have given one of the old farts a good shove off the lift. Just sayin'

painted maypole said...

i used to ski - even after i broke my arm doing it when I was 12. now I live in Louisiana. no more skiing for me! ;)

MamaGeek @ Works For Us said...

BWAHAHAHAHA.

Not only does that sound like fun, but that photo just topped the story off perfectly. He so looks the professional.

Anna said...

I am so loving that ski outfit I almost couldn't read on. but then I loved your post so much I alomst forgot to go back and gaze upon the ski outfit.

It's all good!

Rima said...

Sonny Bono is the very reason why I don't ski. Also, I tried it once and totally forgot about the all important "zig-zag" rule and it was a disaster.

P.S. I have some bling for you.

flutter said...

As well he SHOULD.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like fun, i have always wanted to go skiing,

Love the outfit

Kat said...

HAHAHAHA!!! I love his outfit! That is great!!
My hubby's friend goes skiing with us sometimes and always wears camoflauge (sp?) and bright orange. Very cute. ;)

Anonymous said...

I loved this post because it reminds me that whether you work or stay home you still get crap.
When I left my last job, I had some (older) guy I barely knew ask me if I was leaving because I couldn't handle working anymore after having a baby. It felt good to tell him I got a promotion with another company and a 25% pay raise.

insanemommy said...

You say you want to work?! I'll trade places with you!!