Saturday, July 14, 2007

Your Coffee Table? About To Love You


Intrigued? Is the siren call of John Travolta's lycra-clad groin just too much to bear? I know. I found myself on eBay last week and came across this fabulous hardcover book. John Travolta: Staying Fit! Can you blame me for not resisting? The pelvic thrust alone got me. There are pages, pages I tell you, full of awesome Travolta moves, including some titillating couples stretching.
So, to celebrate the sale of our home I am giving this book away. Because my coffee tables are going to be packed up for a while. And because I won't be writing regularly for a while, and I want to keep things interesting when I do get the chance. Because I'm pretty sure I'm going to have nothing new to say in the next thirteen days, other than maybe we ran out of bubble wrap, or those whores at UHaul are making a mint on packing boxes.
Thirteen days in which to pack up the home. I can totally do this. And then I may just disappear for a while, to nurse my lobotomy scars, because this is what I'm going to need in order to not over think every detail that must be taken care of in less than two weeks. I keep reminding myself how blessed we are to have even sold a home in this market. There are houses in my area that have been for sale for over a year. So who's complaining? Not me. Just, you know, venting a wee bit of steam so I don't end up in the corner curled up around a packing tape dispenser and a bottle of vodka.

I was starting to get a little emotional about leaving this place, even though we're really excited about the next stage. I've started to forget how cold it gets here in the winter, how the extremely high altitude (we make our home 7,000 feet up in the air) makes everything hard, from growing things, to breathing, to giving birth. I was getting sentimental when a drywaller came in to finish Maddie's room last week. He was in his late twenties, with tousled blonde hair and looked like the kind of guy at home with a beer bong in his mouth. When he came to the door, he told me, "Dude, I totally lived here in the eighties with my buddy's family." [insert Beevus or Butthead style laughter]. "Do you still have those gnarly lofts?"
"Yes, we do. We love those lofts."
"Oh man, so did we. We called them The Girl Lofts. Heh, heh. You know? We took girls up there."
"Huh. Great. My kids have their dollhouses up there. And, um, their sticker collections."

Which took me from, Dear God What Have I Done I Can't Leave This Adorable House to Get me Out Of Here Now, How Long Do Body Fluids Stick Around, Anyway?

So we're excited about the future, although we don't have a firm timeline yet, and I'm not going to miss the lofts. I'll check back here in a few days and pick a winner. I'll print out the names of commenters and pick one. I'll post the winner, and soon your coffee table will support some of the best pictures to come out of 1984.

Good luck, and wish me the same.






17 comments:

Nancy said...

Good luck with the packing and move. You are allowed to go on tilt a little, but you are so right about being lucky to have sold in this market. Mine has been on the market since March ... ugh.

Umm, have you seen John lately? Maybe HE should be the winner, lol
Looks like a fun nostalgic book.

moosh in indy. said...

From staying fit to drag.
Oh John, what happened to you?

Fairly Odd Mother said...

God, I hope your lofts don't have carpeting in them; or, if they did, that you replaced them when you first moved in. . .

Have fun packing! I'm a little scared that you ever decided to buy that John Travolta book. What other things are you going to fine while going through the house?!?

Sophie's Mom said...

Oh the things you can get on Ebay! You know... if you get a blacklight it will show up any... umm... bodily fluids. I found this out at the pet store, it will make urine glow in the carpet. The box says it will show up all fluids. It even recommended you take a small one to a hotel when you stay there... ewwww... I think I don't want to know!

Congrats on selling the house! Can't wait to see pics of the new one.

ablondeblogger said...

Oh my gosh, that pelvic thrust photo is hilarious!!

Good luck with moving...hope all goes smoothly.

Mr. Fabulous said...

Wow...sounds like things are a little hectic these days, to say the least!

Oh, I just wanted to comment. Please don't put me in the drawing for the book. I can thrust my own pelvis, thank you very much.

And I often do!

Brat said...

Congrats on selling the house!

I don't envy having to pack it all up to move though!

I hope you are getting some help on that.

I mean, you may be SuperMom, but sheesh! Buy a couple cases of beer and have a packing party! [I'd so be there!]

We'll miss ya while yer off the Interwebs!

metalmom said...

Good luck packing up! Just don't dwell too long over the memorabilia that you'll come across! It will lead you down 'memory lane' and then there's the detour to 'what could have been' and you'll never finish!

Anonymous said...

oh my, check out this terrible news story about young children, this really scares me. http://www.mypetpeeves.com/plog/index.php/archives/2436

Audubon Ron said...

Don't stay away too long.

Joanie said...

Please, please....I need the book!!!! NEED. IT.

Jennifer aka Binky Bitch said...

Good luck with packing!! And moving!!

The book...hilarious!

In the Trenches of Mommyhood said...

You had me at "body fluids". Good luck. Moving sucks. There's just no other way to say it.

BOSSY said...

Afraid to say Bossy is over John Travolta. Now a fitness book starring John Cusack, that's a different matter...

Lorelai said...

Best of luck packing and moving I know how much of a huge task it can be.

Biddy said...

ooooh ooooh i so want that book! it will go great with my 1974 issue of Seventeen

theghelertertwins.blogspot.com said...

I do not envy the packing. However I use to love looking at John Travolta. He seems so old now...